无论我们生活在地球的哪一个角落，都对孩子拥有同一样的爱。我们都愿意把好的奉献给孩子，我们更希望传承给孩子一种方法，让他们学会面对现实，创造未来！
阅读How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk《如何说孩子才会听怎么听孩子才肯说》的经历，将是一次学习爱的技巧与接受爱的训练的过程，它给了你走进孩子内心世界的钥匙，指引你切身体会孩子内心的感受。通过一系列实用有效的方法，帮助你和孩子建立起一个能够快乐交流的平台，使孩子变得不同寻常地愿意与父母配合。掌握了“如何说？”“怎么听？”的技巧，就能开启孩子的心灵世界，与孩子达成美妙的交流沟通，让孩子在您的引导下身心健康发展。
为了建立这个快乐沟通的平台，围绕“如何说”“怎么听”，作者从六个方面进行了探讨和实践：
1、帮助孩子面对他们的感受；
2、鼓励孩子与我们合作；
3、代替惩罚的方法；
4、鼓励孩子自立；
5、恰当地赞赏孩子；
6、让孩子从角色中释放。
尤为可贵的是作者清晰简洁地创造了一套操作方法，给出了实现这六个方面的30种技巧，辅以大量的常见场景和问题加以说明，并配有相应的练习题，让父母可以把这些技巧烂熟于心，灵活运用，随时应付各种情况，做到游刃有余。
Here is the bestselling book that will give you the know-how you need to be more effective with your children—and more supportive of yourself. Enthusiastically praised by parents and professionals around the world, the down-to-earth, respectful approach of Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish makes relationships with children of all ages less stressful and more rewarding. Now, in this thirtieth-anniversary edition, these award-winning experts share their latest insights and suggestions based on feedback they’ve received over the years. Their methods of communication—illustrated with delightful cartoons showing the skills in action—offer innovative ways to solve common problems. You’ll learn how to:
Cope with your child’s negative feelings—frustration, disappointment, anger, etc.
Express your anger without being hurtful
Engage your child’s willing cooperation
Set firm limits and still maintain goodwill
Use alternatives to punishment
Resolve family conflicts peacefully
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk《如何说孩子才会听怎么听孩子才肯说》是一本畅销三十多年的家教图书，由全球畅销家教书系作者、美国杰出的教育专家阿黛尔 法伯与伊莱恩 玛兹丽施专为青春期孩子家长所著。自出版以来就受到了来自世界各地父母和专家热情洋溢的赞美，已被译为30多种文字风靡全球，销量数百万，全球已有20多万个亲子团队使用此书作为家长培训教材，堪称“父母和孩子的沟通圣经”。
本书选取亲子关系中常见的场景，告诉父母“尊重感受、寻求合作、代替惩罚、如何赞赏、应对愤怒”的珍贵方法和技巧，使父母在短时间内得心应手，学会沟通，把和孩子的矛盾化解于无形之中。书中又汇集了父母们常问到的问题和作者给出的答案，既是应用实例，也是父母随时应用的参考书。本版本为英文版30周年纪念版，已重新修订并增加作者女儿乔安娜•法伯讲述本书理念和方法对自己成长的巨大帮助的新内容，非常适合各位爸爸妈妈或家庭教育讲师阅读使用。
推荐理由：
1. 一本融合爱与沟通技巧的神奇之书，一本让孩子健康成长的父母必读之书；
2. 众多国内外家长、育儿专家、教育媒体力荐的“育儿宝典”，家庭教育必读书目；
3. 内容丰富，图文并茂，写作条理清晰，有较多的案例分析及练习题，实用性强；
4. 本版本为30周年纪念版，内容已全新修订，含作者分享的新观点及建议；
5. 英文原版，内容原汁原味，词汇用语较为简单，读起来并不艰涩难懂。
The ultimate “parenting bible” (The Boston Globe) with a new foreword—and available as an ebook for the first time—a timeless, beloved book on how to effectively communicate with your child from the #1 New York Times bestselling authors.
Internationally acclaimed experts on communication between parents and children, Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish “are doing for parenting today what Dr. Spock did for our generation” (Parent Magazine). Now, this bestselling classic includes fresh insights and suggestions as well as the author’s time-tested methods to solve common problems and build foundations for lasting relationships, including innovative ways to: Cope with your child’s negative feelings, such as frustration, anger, and disappointment. Express your strong feelings without being hurtfu. Engage your child’s willing cooperation. Set firm limits and maintain goodwill. Use alternatives to punishment that promote self-discipline. Understand the difference between helpful and unhelpful praise. Resolve family conflicts peacefully.
Enthusiastically praised by parents and professionals around the world, the down-to-earth, respectful approach of Faber and Mazlish makes relationships with children of all ages less stressful and more rewarding.
Review
“Will bring about more cooperation from children than all the yelling and pleading in the world.” — Christian Science Monitor
“An excellent book that’s applicable to any relationship.” — Washington Post
“Practical, sensible, lucid… the approaches Faber and Mazlish lay out are so logical you wonder why you read them with such a burst of discovery.” — Family Journal
“An exceptional work, not simply just another ‘how to’ book… All parents can use these methods to improve the everyday quality of t heir relationships with their children.” — Fort Worth Star Telegram
阿黛尔•法伯(Adele Faber)和伊莱恩•玛兹丽施(Elaine Mazlish)是国际著名亲子沟通专家，她们的著作不仅深受家长的欢迎，而且也得到专业人士的认可。
两位作者的首部作品《解放父母解放孩子》(Liberated Parents Liberated Children)曾荣获“克里斯多佛”奖，第二本书《如何说孩子才会听怎么听孩子才肯说》(How to Talk So Kids Will Listen&Listen So Kids Will Talk)销售量超过300万本，被翻译成30多种语言。关于这本书的讲座教材和录像带被全球20多万个亲子团体所使用。 两位作者都是三个孩子的母亲，她们已被收录于美国名人录。
Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish are #1 New York Times bestselling and award-winning authors whose books have sold more than three million copies and have been translated into over thirty languages. How to Talk So Kids Can Learn—At Home and in School, was cited by Child Magazine as the “best book of the year for excellence in family issues in education.” The authors’ group workshop programs and videos produced by PBS are currently being used by parent and teacher groups around the world. They currently reside in Long Island, New York and each is the parent of three children.
Acknowledgments 谢辞
A Letter to Readers 给读者的一封信
How to Read and Use This Book 如何阅读本书
Helping Children Deal With Their Feelings帮助孩子面对他们的感受
Engaging Cooperation 鼓励孩子与我们合作
Alternatives to Punishment 代替惩罚的方法
Encouraging Autonomy 鼓励孩子自立
Praise 学会赞赏孩子
Freeing Children from Playing Roles 让孩子从角色中释放
Putting It All Together 融会贯通
What’s It All About, Anyway? 这一切是为了什么？
Afterword 精彩在继续
Many Years Later 多年以后
I. The Letters 读者的来信
II. Yes, but…What if…How about…? 是这样，但是……如果……会怎么样？
III. Their Native Tongue 孩子们的“母语”
30th Anniversary 30周年纪念版感言
The Next Generation 下一代的成长
Some Books You May Interesting 为读者推荐的家教图书
For Further Study… 进一步研究
Index 索引
I was a wonderful parent before I had children. I was an expert on why everyone else was having problems with theirs. Then I had three of my own.
Living with real children can be humbling. Every morning I would tell myself, “Today is going to be different,” and every morning was a variation of the one before: “You gave her more than me!” … “That’s the pink cup. I want the blue cup.” … “This oatmeal looks like throw-up.” … “He punched me.” . . . “I never touched him!” … “I won’t go to my room. You’re not the boss over me!”
They finally wore me down. And though it was the last thing I ever dreamed I’d be doing, I joined a parent group. The group met at a local child-guidance center and was led by a young psychologist, Dr. Haim Ginott.
The meeting was intriguing. The subject was “children’s feelings,” and the two hours sped by. I came home with a head spinning with new thoughts and a notebook full of undigested ideas:
Direct connection between how kids feel and how they behave.
When kids feel right, they’ll behave right.
How do we help them to feel right?
By accepting their feelings!
Problem—Parents don’t usually accept their children’s feelings.
